God created our babies to grow up and become autonomous individuals. They’re thinking more independently, coming up with their own new ideas (and experiments), and testing the limits of their growing power, both within themselves and especially in relation to others. I know I should be excited by this but it’s requiring so much of me… it’s been hard, lately. These last few days I’ve pulled out all of my parenting books and have been trying to figure out some new strategies for these new stages.
This morning I read Psalm 1:1-3, “Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither.”
When I read and reread the phrase “his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night,” I pictured a young tree whose driving passion is to send its roots deeper and deeper until they find water. It reminded me of my walk around our yard, last night, where my soul was filled by the bursting forth of life all around me. The blueberry and goumi bushes that my husband had planted a few years ago have finally set loads of immature berries. In addition to fruit, I discovered a tiny nest in one of them with two newly hatched birds! The thing is, newly planted bushes and trees rarely produce fruit in their first and second years of growth (and certainly cannot host families of birds) because the vast majority of their energy is going into the establishment of their roots.
Last night, though, I was up past midnight reading parenting books. So this morning God’s living Word spoke through the psalmist, opening the eyes of my heart to my deepest need. I journaled, “God, I’m feeling empty and thirsty. Please forgive me for jumping right into problem solving mode and seeking wisdom apart from You. I have some good parenting strategies. And I’m thankful to be able to learn more. But it’s the fruit of Your Spirit that I’ve been lacking more than anything. I’ve been so impatient. I want others (including my children) to make my life easier, not harder. Your Spirit produces joy but this morning I was struggling to delight even in my own kids. And I’m anxious. I’m anxious about their behavior. About their future. About my performance and competence. About my reputation… I’ve been missing You while looking for solutions in parenting books. But You are the way, the truth, and the life. I need to send my roots down deep into Your word because I know that you reward those who earnestly seek you (Hebrews 11:6), and are absolutely faithful to your promise that anyone who comes to you will be filled and burst forth with your Living Water (John 7:37-39).”
So. This blog is about using stories to invite our kids into God’s great story of redemption. Well, today’s story is one that my kids get to witness, firsthand. This momma is broken but God’s mercies are new every morning! I’d thought I needed strategies, plans, and methods. But I’d somehow missed how distracted I’ve been from my source. So praise be to the God who invites us to “Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and you will delight in the richest of fare. Give ear and come to me; listen, that you may live” (Isaiah 55:1-3).
Today’s story is also about the brokenness of wisdom in this age. Our minds were created to flourish within the context of a relationship with God. So outside of that context, we cannot trust even our own minds to be working to their full potential. When I’m feeling insecure or out of control, it’s so easy for me to turn first to sources other than the Lord. But even though they can be immensely helpful, neither parenting experts nor my friends have the power to transform this heart of stone into a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 26:36). Neither can they produce the fruit of God’s Spirit in me. And today, that is what this family is needing most. Thanks be to God!
So, how are you sending your roots down into the Living Water, these days? If you could use some encouragement in this area I’d love for you to join me as I read and journal my way through the prayer book of Jesus (aka, the Book of Psalms). I’ve been using a really simple method of journaling for 18 years now that I’m attaching here. I think it may have originally came from The Navigators, but I was introduced to it as a required class assignment in college! My husband and I are also reading through Clay and Sally Clarkson’s The Lifegiving Parent with a few other couples. I expect that it may prompt a few blog posts over the next several months, if you want to read along with us.
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