when they ask

shaping children's faith through story

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Making Room Week 5: Stewardship and Calling

At the outset of this series, we said that we were going to be making room for what matters most. This week we’ll be considering the particulars of what that is for each of us . When the New Testament speaks of our calling, most of the descriptions apply to all of God’s children. We are called to unity, holiness, love, citizenship, and humility, among other things. But God has also set specific tasks before us and designed us in unique ways to invest in his kingdom differently. In this video we’re challenged to rest in God’s love as we live faithfully in our specific contexts. As always, I am so thankful to the Summit Church team for all of their hard work in producing these videos to guide us through Lent

Songs

Memorization

His master said to him, “Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master” (Matthew 25:21).

Bible Stories*

  • Parable of the Talents (Matthew 25:14-30)
  • Parable of the Wise Steward (Matthew 24:45-51)
  • Heroes of Faith (Hebrews 11-12:2)
  • Worship and Service by Design (Romans 12:1-8, cf. Acts 2)
  • Mary of Bethany (Luke 10:38-42)

Activities

Making Room Week 4: Personal Confession

Breathe. Last week was heavy for me. I know that I ended the video by calling us to worship, but the confession that precedes it is tough. How about you? How are you feeling, heading into this fourth week of Lent? Whereas we’ve been focusing on the Kingdom of God in our communities and world, this week we’ll be reflecting on our need for Jesus’ resurrection in each of our personal lives. For any who are just joining us, I’ve been working with an amazing team from my church on weekly videos to guide our congregation through Lent. Since I’m also leading my own young children (2 and 4) through the season, I’ve included additional resources below that we’re planning (or hoping!) to use on a more daily basis. Thanks for journeying with us!

Songs

Memorization

If we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9)

Bible Stories*

  • Jesus’ gift of the Holy Spirit (John 14:15-27; 16:8)
  • Jesus is anointed/ Doctors heal the sick (Luke 7:36-40, 1 John 1:6-9)
  • Jesus chooses imperfect people [The calling of Matthew (Luke 5:27-32), restoration of Peter (John 21:15-19), and conversion of Paul (Acts 9:1-22)]
  • The Greatest 2 Commandments (Matthew 22:34-40)
  • Jesus is the Vine/ A New Commandment (John  15:1-12; 13:12-15, 34-35)

Activities

  • Practice / emphasize apologizing to and forgiving one another, this week. When you are impatient with your kids, tell them and ask for forgiveness!
  • Practice sharing Jesus’ love with others, this week. This could be a specific bigger project (like bringing in #10 cans to Summit) or just being aware of opportunities throughout your days.
  • Watch the 2007 movie about the transatlantic slave trade and author of our beloved hymn, Amazing Grace (Common Sense Media recommends this for those over 11 years old).
  • Pray with the physical “palms down, palms up” prayer posture described in Richard Foster’s Celebration of Discipline. He describes, “Begin by placing your palms down as a symbolic indication of your desire to turn over any concerns  you ay have. Inwardly you may pray, ‘Lord, I give you my anger toward John. I release my fear of my dentist appointment this morning…’ After several minutes of surrender, turn your palms up as a symbol of your desire to receive from the Lord. Perhaps you will pray silently: ‘Lord, I would like to receive your divine love for John, your peace about the dentist appointment, your patience, your joy…’” Posture is important! Try physically turning over your burdens of sin to the Lord and then physically open your hands to receive God’s forgiveness and love.

*More details about how our family plans to use these Bible stories can be found here.

We’re praying for you as you lead your little disciples to follow Jesus, this week!

Making Room Week 3: Kingdom of God

Lent is a season for self-examination and confession, an annual opportunity to “remember your baptism” by reflecting on Jesus’ call to follow him in love, death, and new life. This week we’ll look at his first public teaching in the gospel of Luke, through which he essentially declares himself to be the promised Messiah inaugurating God’s long awaited Kingdom. As you watch the video and then use the additional resources, I invite you to prayerfully consider different ways your family might live into and celebrate his kingdom vision for our world, today.

Songs

Memorization

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full (John 10:10).

Bible Stories*

  • Healing miracles (Matthew 15:29-31, cf. Ezekiel 47:1-12 and Revelation 22:1-5)
  • John’s baptism (Luke 3:1-14)
  • Pearl of great price, Rich young ruler (Matthew 13:45-46; 19:16-30)
  • Cleansing the temple (Luke 19:45-48)
  • Love your enemies (Matthew 5:38-48, Luke 22:47-53, possibly 23:34)
  • Jesus frees captives (if age-appropriate, Matthew 8:28-34)

Activities

  • Make a few simple meals and donate the money saved to a food pantry or other ministry (one of our favorites is World Vision).
  • Encourage someone who’s sick
  • Declutter, giving clothes/ toys to Salvation Army
  • Reconcile with “an enemy.”
  • Read The Quiltmaker’s Gift, an amazing story about a greedy king who finds true joy by giving away his many treasures.

*More details about how our family plans to use these resources can be found here.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever (Ephesians 3:21-22)!

Making Room Week 2: Beloved Children

Oh friends, am I allowed to admit that I’m really excited for you to see this video? I think it may be my favorite. As you’ll soon hear, God brought it all together in a pretty uncanny way, and I feel so honored to simply share with you what is being spoken to me. I’d love to hear in the comments how God is working this out in your life! If you’re just joining us, I’m helping create these weekly videos to lead our church community through Lent. Last week’s post shared more about our family’s approach as we walk through this season. And once again, thank you to the amazing Summit Church team for producing the images, videos, and files with additional resources in this series!

Songs

Memorization

  • John 1:12
  • The Lord’s Prayer (review)

Bible Stories*

  • Jesus’ baptism and temptation (Luke 3:21-22, 4:1-13, Genesis 3:1-6, John 1:12)
  • Jesus welcomes little children (Matthew 18:1-6, 19:13-15, Zephaniah 3:17)
  • Jesus sees us differently (John 4:1-42)
  • God’s love finds his lost children (Luke 15, Genesis 1:27)
  • Jesus describes himself as a mother hen (Matthew 23:37-39, Deuteronomy 32:10-11, Psalm 57:1, Psalm 91:4)

Activities

  • Make or buy a welcome gift for a new baby in your life, or take one to a pregnancy care center.
  • For you local folks, watch the Live Eaglecam of the Bald Eagle nest at St. Pat’s park, and then some of the Youtube videos of the parents caring for their babies in previous years. While watching, talk about how God cares for us like momma and daddy Eagles.
  • Snuggle together reading books about our belovedness (see below)

Picture Book

*More details about how our family plans to use these resources can be found here.

And now may Christ dwell in your hearts through faith. And may you be rooted and established in His love, so that you may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God! (adapted from Ephesians 3:14-19)


Making Room: journeying together through Lent

A few weeks ago I was asked to help make weekly videos that can guide our church community through Lent. They will be primarily for teenagers and adults, but since I am walking through the season with my 2 and 4 year olds, we will also include some elements specifically chosen for them.

But first I have a confession. We’ve never done this. Yes, that’s right. This will be our family’s very first time practicing Lent, together!

So while I’ve been excited to plan it for the four of us, I really didn’t anticipate writing about it, this year… until the pastors asked me to help with the videos! So here we are. Perhaps this can encourage you to jump in and try something new, as well, because we really are all in this together!

For a year or so, the kids and I have been playing around with several different ways of nurturing our hearts and minds over breakfast or lunch. They’ve generally included some combination of eating, playing with play dough or slime, coloring, reading and conversation about Bible stories, pretending their Bible stories, learning a hymn, and memory work. Since I really love the rhythm we’ve established, I’m using a similar format during Lent. Therefore, we’ve chosen a theme for each of the videos (to be used by broader congregation), and then found additional songs, Bible stories, verses to memorize, and a few activities or projects to be used throughout the week specifically for kids. More details about how we anticipate using each of these can be found here. Finally, we’ll be listening to a Spotify playlist as we go about our day with songs that help us reflect on the weekly theme.

During this first partial week (beginning on Ash Wednesday) we will focus on habits and prayer. Overall, we are considering this Lenten season as an opportunity to cultivate the soil of our hearts, motivated by Jesus’ parable of the sower in Matthew 13 (and my weedy garden last summer). So in the video, I give an overview and then encourage people to pray about one established habit that they can set aside for the next 7 weeks (pulling weeds), and one new habit to begin (amending soil). And now, without further ado, here’s our first video and additional resources, with a huge thanks to the Summit Church team for producing both it and the graphic at the top of this post!

Songs

Memorization: Matthew 6:9-13

Bible Stories

  • Parable of the Sower (Matthew 13:1-9, 18-23)
  • The Lord’s Prayer (Luke 11: 1, Matthew 6:9-13)
  • Solitude in Prayer (Matthew 6:5-8; Luke 6:12-13)

Activities

  • Plant flower or vegetable seeds
  • Choose family (or individual) habits to add and set aside
  • Create a special prayer closet, corner, or tent
  • Simplify meals (soup and bread)

Picture Books

Making Room: Sunday Morning Introduction

I recently got to introduce a series of videos that our church is making to help people journey through Lent. They’ll be posted, here, on my blog, so here’s the invitation that I extended to our congregation on Sunday morning!

Good morning! For those of you I don’t yet know, I have a background in theology and ministry, but am currently working as a stay at home mom. I am so excited to be helping with some videos that will guide us through Lent. You know, it’s not a season that we have emphasized in our particular church tradition, so I would suspect that it is fairly unfamiliar to many of us. But one of Jesus’ stories makes me think that 2019 may be a good time for that to change.

In one of his parables, Jesus said that God’s word can be like seed that falls among dormant thorns (as a gardener, I’m thinking of thistles). The seed of God’s word sprouts and begins growing, but is quickly choked out by everything else that is also growing up all around it. This is compared with seed planted in good soil, where it has the space and nourishment to grow up healthy, strong, and fruitful. This past July, my garden was a mess. I personally experienced the frustration of things we’d intentionally planted being choked out by everything else that just grew up on its own. And honestly, my out-of-control garden became a fitting picture of my entire life- It was all just too much. Too much stuff, too many commitments, too many voices, too many newsfeeds.. too many desserts. An ill-managed life. So, ever sense I have been all about weeding- uprooting that which doesn’t really matter in order to give space and nourishment to what matters most.

And that, my friends, is going to be our emphasis during the season of Lent. We’re going to pull the weeds, clear the clutter, and then have the brainspace to ask ourselves some important questions, all in an effort to prepare the soil of our hearts for the best news that we will celebrate 7 weeks from now. Beginning this Wednesday and then each Sunday until Easter, we’ll be posting a video that focuses our attention on one particular aspect of following Jesus. The videos are intended for teenagers and adults, single or married. But since I began thinking about this for our family and we already have a rhythm of more daily devotions, the videos will also include elements that I’ll use with my 2 and 4 year olds throughout the week, like songs, Bible stories, activities, and a verse or passage to memorize. And if you are planning on going through this with your own kids, I’ve recently discovered this picture book on Lent that I’m LOVING and would highly recommend.

So, look for those videos, beginning this Wednesday, and I can’t wait to embark on this journey, together.

Why did we turn off the lights when we talked about how God made the world? Waiting in Darkness

When my four year old recently asked this question (about the year prior!), I was shocked and delighted at the clarity with which he remembered our first night of Advent. We had cut our tree the day before, and my husband and I secretly strung the lights after the kids went to bed. On Sunday we gathered next to the tree in our living room, lit a candle, and turned off the lights. I explained that it was the first Sunday of Advent, a season for waiting. During Advent, which means “coming,” we remember how the world waited for Jesus to come as a baby in Bethlehem. We also think about the darkness in our own world and hearts as we wait for Christ’s light to come, today. And finally, we wait for Jesus’ second coming, the day when he’ll return to make all things new.

“While we wait,” I whispered with expectancy, “we’re going to tell the story of how the world waited for Jesus. Each night we’ll take turns hanging one ornament on our tree to help us remember. We begin, now, with the very first sentence in the entire Bible [whispered slowly, with awe and wonder]… In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was formless and void, and darkness was over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters. And God said, ‘let there be light.'” And at this very moment my husband hit the switch for the lights and my kids saw the illuminated tree and garland for the first time that season. It’s a bit dramatic, I know; I absolutely love it! And my son’s recent question affirmed every delicious detail.

I love Advent for how it gives context to our darkness. I know that Jesus saves. I know that God works all things together for our good. But I also know that this world is broken and we join with all of creation in groaning as we eagerly await redemption’s fullness. Like no other season, Advent fills a unique place in my soul that cries out to acknowledge and grieve the particulars of this painful darkness. It doesn’t move me on to joy too quickly, but like my very real life demands that I linger in the waiting. Yet it doesn’t leave me there forever, but leads me to watch for glimmers of the light that will someday break forth as the dawn.

So my family sits in darkness to intensify the glory of the coming light. In our home we try to hold back on most of the festivities until Christmas Eve, which begins a nearly two week period of joyfully celebrating the incarnation. Each morning during Advent my kids open an envelope to discover the special thing we’ll do, that day, to prepare for Christmas. Then before dinner we add an ornament to the tree that symbolizes a story in the history of redemption (our modified version of a Jesse Tree). We do it like this so that we can discuss the story while eating (my kids don’t nap so after dinner we’re all pretty anxious to get them in bed😊). On Christmas Eve we finally pull out the rest of our family’s special Christmas ornaments, adding our unique story to that shared by all Christians. To officially begin our celebration we read Sally Lloyd-Jones’ Song of the Stars and each open one gift (which has been something special to wear to the Christmas Eve service at church).

I hope to write a few more posts about Advent in the coming weeks, but wanted to get this out now as you are making plans for the coming season. If it resonates with you, please subscribe in the sidebar so that you’re notified when I do write more. If you’re curious as to how the specific themes of Advent (waiting, longing, darkness, hope) fit into the whole of the Christian year, you might be interested in Why celebrate the Christian year?. Finally,  please leave a comment if there are particular aspects of Advent or our  traditions about which you are especially curious. Thank you!

When will it be peach season? Embracing seasonality

Wow, it’s been a while! But here I am, writing from a hotel room where I hope to sleep before completing a half-marathon tomorrow morning. That’s the simplest explanation for my absence; I’ve been running instead of writing.  But there’s been more to it than that. Heading into the summer I hadn’t given much thought to how this blog might be impacted by the seasons along with other rhythms of family life and even my own creativity. As homesteaders, much of our summer has been spent either in the garden or the kitchen. As a mother, I’ve been reevaluating some pretty foundational aspects of our parenting, as well as investing energy into a handful of special family events. Then as a blogger, I’ve been reminded often of a prayer in Phillip Newell’s Celtic Benedictions.

For the night followed by the day

for the idle winter ground

followed by the energy of spring

for the infolding of the earth

followed by bursts of unfolding

thanks be to you, O God.

For rest and wakefulness

stillness and creativity

reflection and action

thanks be to you.

Let me know in my own soul and body

the rhythms of creativity that you have established.

Let me know in my family and friendships

the disciplines of withdrawal and the call to engagement.

Let me know for my world

the cycles of renewal

given by you for healing and health

the pattern of the seasons

given by you for the birth of new life.

I think it all started with food. Several years ago it occurred to me that people have almost always been able to survive without electricity, refrigeration, and the fossil fuels used to transport food around the world. This boggled my mind. How and what in the world did they eat?! So began… well, everything, really, but specifically my fascination with discovering God’s abundance  throughout  the year. These last few months our family has been relishing the gifts of each season, beginning with strawberries and service berries, then progressing to goumis, blueberries, peaches, blackberries, autumn olives, and now finally apples.

Eating seasonally is also about waiting and learning to live without, thereby challenging ourselves to look with new eyes on how we might be nourished by what is. As such, I’ve also found great satisfaction in learning to prepare common weeds. Peter Rabbit has eaten the swiss chard? No problem; we can harvest the pigweed! The heat has sent all of my lettuce to seed? Let’s have purslane!  A mouse has made her home and been munching on the tubers growing in our sweet potato bed? Thank God the leaves cook down like spinach!

But embracing the seasons isn’t just about eating. It’s also about attending to what needs to be done. We didn’t grow any fun winter squash varieties I’d picked out of the seed catalogue because I missed their planting season, this spring. The other day I noticed that the fence fell which had been protecting next year’s spring greens. Thus, the chickens had scratched and eaten all of our seedlings. Winter is now too close to begin anew. Early and mid-summer, on the other hand, are not the seasons for planting but for weeding. Where I missed that season I compromised my harvests. And then there’s protection from pests. In order to grow food without chemicals, it’s important to know the life-cycles of our biggest threats. A few years ago a Colorado Potato Beetle infestation ruined one of our crops in a matter of days. The same is true of Squash Bugs. This year we faithfully picked them off (by hand!) for about two weeks when they were first hatching, so they never became a problem for us. There’s a certain window in which we have to do things.

We westerners have been formed in a world where we can pretty much have and do whatever we want whenever we see fit. But it’s not real. We can’t have it all. We can’t do it all. It’s a world created by human ingenuity to project what we wish to be true. We so easily fall prey to this deception, but eating seasonally allows us multiple opportunities each day to practice both healthy restraint and righteous indulgence. And my kids are getting it. I can’t describe my delight over the course of the summer when their questions turned from “but why can’t we have those peaches (grown in Spain)?” to “Mom, when will it be peach season in Michigan?” I don’t remember the context, but at one point I asked them “What would happen if we planted peas at the beginning of the summer?” I didn’t know how Adam would respond, but was thrilled when he concluded that “They won’t grow. We plant peas in the spring.” I asked a few other such questions, before making the connection that the same is true in our lives. For everything there is a season.

And so I haven’t been writing.

This has been a season for milestones and experimentation in the life of our family.  We’ve spent a few nights sleeping out on our porch. We’ve tried some new ways of practicing Sabbath, including overnight coffee cake for breakfast and campfires at dinner. We celebrated our first “Family Day” where I wrote out our story and we began a rock memorial of God’s faithfulness. We prepared a special breakfast to honor Adam on his first day of preschool.  We anticipated Christ’s return by reading Scripture and savoring the sweetness of honey and apples during the Feast of Trumpets. We even went camping for the first time!

It has also been a season of reevaluating some key aspects of our parenting and seeking out the wisdom of others, especially in our approach to discipline. Last January I came to know the ministry of Sally Clarkson through her inspiring book, The Lifegiving Home (which I listened to on Audible while cleaning my kitchen).  This summer I subscribed to her online community where I’ve been able to articulate questions and glean from others. Finally, I read her husband’s excellent Heartfelt Discipline, which I imagine will continue bearing fruit for the remainder of our lives. I don’t feel quite ready to write much about these shifts, but want to acknowledge that they are in process. It’s been a season for drawing inward.

And finally, it has been a season of investing in my own physical health. It’s a bit of a long story, but it’s also not. We kept getting sick. I kept gaining weight. We were celebrating God’s gifts from the soil all while my health was declining. The story that I articulated about the goodness and wisdom of God’s creation wasn’t being supported by my own choices; I’m pretty sure my blood sugar isn’t elevated by the foods coming out of our garden! Things needed to change. So I registered for a half-marathon (which wouldn’t allow me to make excuses for not exercising) and made some changes in my diet. It has required both time and energy, but I’ve been repeatedly encouraged that I’m right to prioritize it, at least for this particular season.

Now, as a very long aside please hear me say that I do not think we need to prioritize physical health during every season of our lives! I am ever so thankful that God has given us resilient bodies. Please don’t allow yourself to feel condemned based on this part of my story. God loves us and extends to us God’s great grace! That said, it was time for me. There’s a section of Adam’s favorite book, St. George and the Dragon, where the knight is tempted to take an easier road but is challenged, “go down into the valley and fight the dragon that you have been sent to fight.” This has been my dragon. I’m in Bible Study Fellowship where we recently considered the life of Caleb in the book of Joshua  (see chapter 14). This has been my hill. My Hebron. But it may not be yours. While running I’ve worked on memorizing Hebrews 12, which begins “… let us run with endurance the race that is set before us…” It doesn’t say, “let us run the race that was set before [some other hero of the faith].” This has been my race. What is yours?

So. That’s where we’ve been. I’ve been choosing to engage in the work and gifts of this season. Through it all I’ve been thinking about this blog and the Church year. I think I may have read somewhere that the liturgical seasons of Advent through Pentecost (roughly December through June) are when we focus on God’s redemptive work in history (the coming of Christ, Jesus’ death and resurrection, and the birth of the Church), whereas Ordinary Time provides those of us living in the Northern Hemisphere the opportunity to practice God’s redemptive work in creation (the cycles of birth and death; the processes of pruning, tending, and cultivating; the particular gifts of each season; the wisdom of preserving abundant harvests; etc.). It’s certainly been that way for me. With each failed crop and great bounty I’ve been aware of life’s seasonality. A difference, though, is that the physical seasons will come around again. I’ll get to plant my cool winter squash this coming June and try again with spring greens come August. But this was my last summer with these particular 2 and 4 year olds.

What about you? What is the work set before you in these days? In which gifts will you indulge and give thanks?

Oh, and I ran that half-marathon, thanks be to God!

 

Why did they have to find a new home? Loving our (immigrant) neighbors

Fleeing violence in their own country, my children gathered up their baby, diaper bag, sun hats, and sandals to trek across our backyard desert in search of a new home. Earlier we’d read the story of the (three) wise men from Desmond Tutu’s storybook Bible.  In light of recent changes in our country’s immigration policy, I was especially struck by the story’s conclusion, “Years later, the angel again came to Joseph in a dream… the little family packed up and crossed the desert again to find a new home in Nazareth.”

It was one of those moments where I just pray that God will bring a distraction or close my kids’ ears if I’m headed in a direction that I shouldn’t go. And in that confidence, I began. “Adam, do you remember the other day when we turned on the TV and saw a classroom full of children with cappuccino colored skin?” I swirled the drink in my hand and showed it to him. He’d remembered. “Well, most of those kids were there because, like Mary and Joseph, their parents were afraid of them being hurt. Many of them come from countries where, like King Herod, men use violence to keep their power. So those children’s parents brought them on a long and dangerous journey across the desert of Mexico to our country, the United States, in hopes of being safe.” I then pulled down our globe and showed them some common routes.  He had a lot of questions about why parents feel their children are in danger, so I explained that violent gangs sometimes hurt others in order to scare people into obeying them. When he wondered if anybody wanted to kill 4 year olds, I assured him that we are so thankful to live in a country with laws that seek to protect people from violence, which is precisely why parents are bringing their children here. I also reiterated parents’ great love for their children and our commitment to protect them. We then talked about how God sees people who are different and encourages those who feel afraid, expressing joy that we might welcome others with the hands, feet, and love of Jesus. It was a pretty long conversation.

I’m sure this seems like a political statement. And I suppose it is, in that I’ve chosen to first describe immigrant families as those fleeing violence as opposed to those engaging in it. But this post is really not about immigration policy. I have only a very, very small understanding of the complexities involved. Rather, it’s about shaping our hearts toward those we are specifically commanded to welcome and love. This morning I decided to take advantage of an opportunity to frame what we saw on TV, and in so doing be the one who first describes immigration to my children. I recently overheard a young child around my son’s age say that she didn’t like another’s skin. We humans are naturally uncomfortable with things and people that are unfamiliar to us. This is the course of least resistance. This is the way our kids will naturally develop. This is human nature. Then on top of that there are many perspectives in our public and popular discourse that I don’t want my kids adopting as truth. So I’ve embraced my privileged position as the one who gets to shape their first impressions.

Also, just yesterday I was describing to a friend why I don’t think everything in the Bible is appropriate for children (one of my first posts on this blog was actually about why I wasn’t teaching my three year old much about Jesus’ crucifixion). I want the Bible to interpret the evil that my kids will inevitably witness in the world around (and within!) them, instead of it being their first introduction to human depravity. It doesn’t make sense to me that we would shield them from violence on TV (recognizing it as developmentally harmful) but then inundate them with it in the story of redemption. This seems like the perfect example of that to me. I’ve actually never felt comfortable teaching them this particular aspect of the Christmas story (Herod’s rampage). But today it felt appropriate.

About an hour after this conversation Adam reminded me, “Mom! We forgot to pretend our story!” Lately we’ve been trying to further engage with the Bible in this way. So we decided that I’d be the angel, Adam’s baby would be Jesus, and my kids would play the parts of Mary and Joseph. So as Joseph and Mary slept on the couch, I shook my son awake to warn him that King Herod was going to try to kill Jesus. He immediately sprung into action waking “Mary” and packing the diaper bag. I was absolutely delighted when Lydia pulled out her baby carrier to keep Jesus safe on the journey, even demanding that he wear his pink sun hat to protect his head! At this point they were only conscious of pretending the biblical story, but the irony certainly wasn’t lost on me. So after deciding that our house was Bethlehem and the garden would be Egypt, they set off.

Again, I just shake my head in wonder and gratitude. What privilege is mine!

 

 

Parenting from the Source: sending our roots down deep

God created our babies to grow up and become autonomous individuals. They’re thinking more independently, coming up with their own new ideas (and experiments), and testing the limits of their growing power, both within themselves and especially in relation to others. I know I should be excited by this but it’s requiring so much of me… it’s been hard, lately. These last few days I’ve pulled out all of my parenting books and have been trying to figure out some new strategies for these new stages.

This morning I read Psalm 1:1-3, “Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither.

When I read and reread the phrase “his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night,” I pictured a young tree whose driving passion is to send its roots deeper and deeper until they find water. It reminded me of my walk around our yard, last night, where my soul was filled by the bursting forth of life all around me. The blueberry and goumi bushes that my husband had planted a few years ago have finally set loads of immature berries. In addition to fruit, I  discovered a tiny nest in one of them with two newly hatched birds! The thing is, newly planted bushes and trees rarely produce fruit in their first and second years of growth (and certainly cannot host families of birds) because the vast majority of their energy is going into the establishment of their roots.

Last night, though, I was up past midnight reading parenting books. So this morning God’s living Word spoke through the psalmist,  opening the eyes of my heart to my deepest need. I journaled, “God, I’m feeling empty and thirsty. Please forgive me for jumping right into problem solving mode and seeking wisdom apart from You. I have some good parenting strategies. And I’m thankful to be able to learn more. But it’s the fruit of Your Spirit that I’ve been lacking more than anything. I’ve been so impatient. I want others (including my children) to make my life easier, not harder. Your Spirit produces joy but this morning I was struggling to delight even in my own kids. And I’m anxious. I’m anxious about their behavior. About their future. About my performance and competence. About my reputation… I’ve been missing You while looking for solutions in parenting books. But You are the way, the truth, and the life. I need to send my roots down deep into Your word because I know that you reward those who earnestly seek you (Hebrews 11:6), and are absolutely faithful to your promise that anyone who comes to you will be filled and burst forth with your Living Water (John 7:37-39).”

So. This blog is about using stories to invite our kids into God’s great story of redemption. Well, today’s story is one that my kids get to witness, firsthand. This momma is broken but God’s mercies are new every morning! I’d thought I needed strategies, plans, and methods. But I’d somehow missed how distracted I’ve been from my source. So praise be to the God who invites us to “Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and you will delight in the richest of fare. Give ear and come to me; listen, that you may live” (Isaiah 55:1-3).

Today’s story is also about the brokenness of wisdom in this age. Our minds were created to flourish within the context of a relationship with God. So outside of that context, we cannot trust even our own minds to be working to their full potential. When I’m feeling insecure or out of control, it’s so easy for me to turn first to sources other than the Lord. But even though they can be immensely helpful, neither parenting experts nor my friends have the power to transform this heart of stone into a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 26:36). Neither can they produce the fruit of God’s Spirit in me. And today, that is what this family is needing most. Thanks be to God!

 

So, how are you sending your roots down into the Living Water, these days? If you could use some encouragement in this area I’d love for you to join me as I read and journal my way through the prayer book of Jesus (aka, the Book of Psalms). I’ve been using a really simple method of journaling for 18 years now that I’m attaching here. I think it may have originally came from The Navigators, but I was introduced to it as a required class assignment in college! My husband and I are also reading through Clay and Sally Clarkson’s The Lifegiving Parent with a few other couples. I expect that it may prompt a few blog posts over the next several months, if you want to read along with us.

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